Tough Weekend

The past 24 hours have been especially tough for the Wheeler house. I got home from school today and Jay was on the phone with Zeke's trainer, Steven. Zeke is our lab puppy that we bought with hopes of him being a wonderful hunting dog. Steven said that he had noticed Zeke limping last week and it had worsened this week. The owner of the kennel took him to the vet and he has severe hip displasia. This was such a shock to us because we used a breeder that has an excellent reputation and who rarely has any health issues with their dogs. Zeke's dad was a newer sire and as time has gone on, he has thrown a few pups that have had hip trouble, but none as bad as Zeke.
They told us that they were going to be pulling him from the training program immediately and that we could pick him up. At this point, they think our options are to replace the hip, try natural remedies, or have him put to sleep. We are just crushed because we have grown so attached to him and had such high hopes for him. I cried last night until my eyes were almost swollen shut.
We made the drive to Oxford today to pick him up and had a long stay at the kennel talking with the trainier and the owner. I must say that they were wonderful and did everything possible to make sure that we felt comfortable taking him home. They had taken an x-ray at the vet and it is just pitiful. We are going to try to go to the vet on Monday and see what they think his quality of life will be. We just have some tough decisions to make, and are trying to enjoy him while we can. Right now, I'm on my couch watching him sleep on his 'place.' He looks so peaceful and I wonder if he knows how hard of a road he has ahead of him. He is only 8 months old, so it is so sad that he is already having so many issues. I also feel so bad for Jay, because he was so excited about having a dog to hunt with.

As if this wasn't enough, my Nana is very sick and in the hospital. She has severe breathing problems and has been in the hospital before, but this time was quite worse. My dad sent me a text message Friday telling me he was taking her to the emergency room. She was having so much trouble breathing that she could barely even go to the bathroom. Today, the Dr. told us that she would be unable to be alone as she doesn't have the strength to take care of herself. My aunt wants to take her home with her, but she isn't in the best health herself. I'm afraid that she is going to end up in a nursing home. The Dr. said that she is pumped full of anitbiotics right now and that, eventually, she will be back in the hospital. He feels like that when she comes back, it will be so bad that she will have to be put on a ventilator. Her Dr. is meeting with my dad and my aunts this week, and I think that it is safe to say that it is only going to get worse.

I just ask you all pray for Jay, myself, and the rest of my family as we feel certain that we have a tough road ahead. I know that the Lord does not give us more than we can take, so he must think that I am very strong. I guess he has much more faith about my ability to make it through than I do.

15 Weeks

How far along? 15 Weeks

Total weight gain: 5 lbs-still
Maternity clothes? No maternity clothes, yet. I can tell that my pants are getting tighter in the waist. It’s strange because they still fit everywhere else!
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep: I am sleeping so much better since I got my Boppy Body Pillow. I used to wake up at night freaking out because I was on my back. That really helps me sleep on my sides. I actually slept all night last night! Between bathroom trips and restlessness, that hasn’t happened in a LONG time!
Best moment this week: Deciding that I am going to have a gender reveal party for my family. One of my fellow teachers makes beautiful cakes for this occasion, so I am going to have our families over to the house for dinner and ‘the big reveal.’ I also looked at baby clothes for the first time this week. I can already tell that I am going to be in T-R-O-U-B-L-E!
Miss Anything? Not being able to just go and do things. I asked Jay today if we could go skiing this winter and he basically vetoed that immediately!
Movement: Nothing, yet, but I have had my suspicions. This baby is going to have to do a back flip before I will probably recognize it.
Food cravings: Still loving sour things. This is especially crazy because Jay loves sour things more than anyone I know. I have never cared for them, so now we are fighting over everything sour that I bring in the house J.
Anything making you queasy or sick: No, feeling great!
Gender: Still waiting
Labor Signs: No
Symptoms: Outside of being tired, I haven’t had many symptoms this week. I have had to remind myself that I was pregnant a couple of times.
Belly Button in or out? in
Wedding rings on or off? on
Happy or Moody most of the time: Mostly happy, but I have cried more this past week than I can remember in quite a while. It’s like I get started and can’t stop-haha!
Looking forward to: Finding out the gender and starting to REALLY show!

I'm starting to see a little bump when I look in the mirror-so exciting!! I know I'm pregnant, but when I can start to see it, it makes it even that much more real. I want you all to remind me of this the day that it is the middle of June, 85 degrees, and I am the size of a beached whale. Remind me that I was really wanting to show in January!

Last night, we had the best time. We went to eat with Jeremy and Randi Allgood and their little boy, Eason. I have been around lots of babys, but since I have been pregnant, this is the first time I have been around a baby for this long. He is honestly one of the best babies that I have been around, and I learned that the parenting style of the parents is truly reflected in the child's disposition. They are very relaxed, low-key parents and so is Eason. The entire time we were eating, he just sat there, looked around, and never made a noise. If only I can be so lucky!!

When we got back to their house, I changed my first diaper-and a poopy one, at that. My first diaper experience was with our friends, Matt and Angie, and their baby, Isabelle. She had just pooped and was eating real food at this point, so they made sure to give me a very 'full' diaper. I opened the diaper and immediately shut it and yelled, "Ohhhhhh!!!" I slowly stepped away from the table wondering how something so precious could produce something so vial!

This time around, I was much more determined. I got the diaper on and didn't even get sprayed. Now, I know that if I have a little boy, I will live to regret those words, but I had to say it. I can't wait until Eason is about 16 or 17 and I can tell him that he was my first successful diaper change-hehe! I can already tell that I will love the smell of a baby (when their diaper is clean). I can just smell it while I'm typing.

Such a fun night, and a small look at what is to come. I know that there are stressful times, but seeing the love that Randi and Jeremy have for their little boy is so sweet, and I can't wait to expereince that for myself.

Daycares and Doctors

This week, my baby prepwork has focused on two topics: finding a daycare and finding a pediatrician for the baby. I must tell you that out of everything that is involved with having a baby, finding a form of childcare that I am satisfied with is the most nerveracking.

I went to eat lunch with some girlfriends before Christmas and came home feeling like I was an uneducated parent, already!! I hadn't even given any thought to finding daycare, yet. I mean, I wasn't even out of the first trimester!!!!! I was quickly informed by my friends (who are mostly moms or further along in their pregnancies than me) that there are lots of people that keep children in Kennett, but very few that you would actually want to send your child to. They quickly discussed a myriad of names, none of which I recognized and then moved on to the next subject. I, on the other hand, was reeling. I couldn't remember any of the names, and didn't even know where to begin.

After about 3 weeks of calling, and calling, and CALLING I am about 95 percent sure that I have found childcare that I will be very satisfied with. I still think I am going to try to find a backup just in case something doesn't work out. I do not even want to think about the day that I will drop little baby Wheeler off at the daycare for the first time. I'm sure that my makeup will need a touch up--big time! One thing that I think will help me feel better is there will be church friends there. My good friend Becky said that she was going to tell her daugher to 'watch out for the little Wheeler baby.' The Little Wheeler Baby.....I'm getting excited already!

On the other hand, finding a pediatrician was much easier than finding daycare. While everyone has a different story as to whether or not they will work, or who will keep their baby, everyone has a pediatrician. I believe that we decided on Children's Clinic in Jonesboro. This is actually where I started going when Dr. Gubin said that he really couldn't help me with my allergies, anymore. I was very sick as a child, so I hope the baby gets Jay's immune system. I loved Children's Clinic so I feel good about that decision. We haven't completely decided on a Dr., yet, but we have narrowed it down to a couple. The thing that I keep hearing over and over is that they are all wonderful and that they are open every day except for Christmas day-two VERY good things to hear.

It feels good to cross things off the baby list, although it seems like as I get one thing accomplished I find 5 more things that I need to do. In the end, I know that everything will get accomplished; it always does. I guess the next thing on the list is deciding on whether or not to get maternity pictures....cringe!!! I guess that will just have to be another post.......

14 Weeks

How far along? 14 Weeks

Total weight gain: 5 lbs
Maternity clothes? I wore a maternity shirt today, but just because I liked it-hehe!
Stretch marks? none yet
Sleep: Sleeping okay. I got my boppy body pillow in the mail today and I can’t wait to try it out tonight.
Best moment this week: Getting out of my first trimester!!!! So excited for the ‘best’ trimester of pregnancy!
Miss Anything? Buying clothes from Boston Proper. Their Spring collection just came out-so cute!!! Also sushi.
Movement: Nothing, yet.
Food cravings: Anything sour!!! I bought a bag of lemons the other day and have almost finished it off. BTW lime and salt popcorn is AMAZING!!!!
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really, anymore. I just cannot eat much meat at one time.  
Gender: ????
Labor Signs: No
Symptoms: Going to the bathroom ALL the time, belly growing pains, and acne L. My Clarisonic has done wonders for my face, though.
Belly Button in or out? in
Wedding rings on or off? on
Happy or Moody most of the time: HAPPY!
Looking forward to: Finding out the gender on Jan 31.

It's been so much easier to monitor and control my tiredness. I am starting to figure out what I can do without having to take a nap! I am slightly showing (mostly at night)-haha! I was concerned that I would be stressed out about my weight, but I am loving my changing body and my ability to be closer to the baby. Before I get out of bed in the morning, I can usually feel the baby when I roll from my left side to my back. I wake Jay up all night grabbing his arm and putting it on my belly so he can feel, but he doesn't mind :)

Where have I been???

It has been such a long time since I have blogged that I can't even begin to talk about all that has happened. During the last post I made, we were just picking up Zeke, it was the middle of summer, and Jay and I were excited about the prospect of starting a family. Well......

Our Christmas Card Photo

Zeke is 8 months old, now, Christmas is finished, another semester of school has gone by, and most exciting.....I'M PREGNANT!!!!!!

We are so excited about starting a family, but I wouldn't be lying if I said that it has been a rocky ride. I was on fertility treatments for a few months and they completely made me a different person. The side effects were crazy and one of the medications would just put me into a fog for about a week-not good when your job is to control 140 7th graders!!!

I would take all of the medicine and go to the Dr. and they would tell me that it didn't work, meaning that I didn't ovulate-very frustrating. After this happened in October, I had a feeling one day and decided to go home and take an ovualtion test. To my shock, it was positive!! I was so excited and I called the Dr. and they told me to come back in for more bloodwork. After going back, they told me that it didn't work again-crushing. A couple of weeks later, I was feeling 'wierd' and just had a feeling that I needed to take a pregnancy test. I made Jay go buy 'the good ones' and BINGO, two lines!!!! I was so happy that I didn't even know what to do. I took another one the next morning and it was positive again. I called the Dr., AGAIN, and told them that I had a positive test. At this point, I was pretty sure that they thought I was crazy, but they told me to come back in for a test. To their surprise, it was positive!!!!!

At the first appt. I got the biggest surprise of my life, TWINS!!!!!!!! We were so shocked/thrilled that we didn't even know what to say to each other. Jay and I went to Target and just walked up and down all of the rows of baby things thinking about how we were going to need two of everything. I stared at that ultrasound picture constantly and tried to imagine how our life was going to change.

Unfortunately, that excitement was short-lived because at our next appointment, there was only one heartbeat. That was a feeling that I had never experienced because, on one hand, I was so sad to loose a baby, but on the other hand, I felt even more lucky to have one perfectly healthy baby inside of me. I have never been so torn in my emotions before in my life.

I remember getting in the car and telling God that I wasn't going to be mad at him (much like I had been for not letting us get pregnant easily). It was very odd the peace that he brought over me during that time, and the overwhelming sense that there was a very good reason that we experienced this. We didn't talk much about the pregnancy for the next month, and I slowly realized that it is very common to lose a twin. While it didn't make it any easier, it was reassuring to know that I wasn't the only one.

I think that I really healed the most when I was talking to my pastor. It was during that conversation that I realized that God had given me a gift. Many people are pregnant with twins, but don't ever know because they don't have an ultrasound until they are too far along to know. God gave me the opportunity to have an early ultrasound so I could know and look forward to meeting our son or daughter in Heaven.

As the months went by, and the checkups were continually good, we became more and more comfortable with being excited about the pregnancy. As I got closer to getting out of the first trimester, I got REALLY excited!!! We had our most recent checkup last Tuesday and, once again, heard a healthy heartbeat-164 beats per minute. We will have the opportunity to do a gender scan on January 31 and I can't wait to know if we will have a boy or a girl. I feel like after that, the fun will really begin.

I haven't been doing a very good job of taking belly pics, because I'm not really showing yet. I'm still in my regular jeans and I've only gained 5 pounds, so there's not much to see. I saw the cutest blog on the internet in which the blogger has done a WONDERFUL job of documenting her pregnancy. Her site is http://littlebabygarvin.blogspot.com/. I am going to use her as my inspiration and try to do a weekly photo and blog post about where I am at in my pregnancy.

If this isn't your cup of tea, just ignore, but I feel like this will be so neat to show the baby one day when they are old enough to realize and appreciate the experience. Hopefully, since I am making a public commitment I will stick to it. I'm 14 weeks now, so I guess I have about 26 posts to go....EXCITING!!!!!